


Echoing Gloom

by altermona



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Child Abuse, Dealing With Trauma, Domestic Violence, Hurt/Comfort, Illusions, M/M, Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-09-05 01:00:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16800541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/altermona/pseuds/altermona
Summary: The group gets separated while fleeing from the Reaper. Akira and Ryuji end up in a strange, empty room without an exit, where faceless shadows start to make them confront their worst memories.





	Echoing Gloom

**Author's Note:**

> **Make sure to check the tags and warnings before reading** , since this fic deals with themes that can be unpleasant or triggering for some people. That being said, if you're here only for the rape/non-con, then you'll be disappointed, since it's more about the consequences than the act itself.

When they heard the sound of chains over the noises of that battle, it was already too late: the Reaper was upon them, shooting in their direction.

Morgana changed to his car form, telling everyone to get in. However, Akira and Ryuji were too far from him, and to get to Morgana, they’d have to cross the Reapers way.

“Run!” screamed Morgana. “We’ll meet you in the safe room!”

And so they did, running as fast as they could, away from that fearsome thing. Ryuji grabbed Akira’s arm, making him move faster.

“Where are we going?” he asked.

“Anywhere,” answered Akira.

They kept going, without looking back, until they reached a narrow set of stairs, leading to what seemed to be a dark room. A heavy, bad feeling took Akira’s chest, but before he could even think about it, the approaching sound of chains made his doubts disappear.

“Let’s go!” he said.

Ryuji agreed, and both went down that set of stairs. It went down for a long time, way longer than seemed right. Soon, the sound of the Reaper grew distant, and the light coming from the upper floor also disappeared. Both of them walked in the complete darkness, with careful steps not to fall.

“Where does it go?” asked Ryuji. “We should be at least ten floors down by now.”

“I have no idea…” answered Akira, who wasn’t too fond of dark, narrow places. “But we can’t go back.”

“I know.”

It took a few more minutes for them to reach the end of those steps. They were in an empty room, illuminated by a dim light, that allowed them to see each other and a little of their surroundings.

“Let’s look for the exit,” said Akira.

They searched the room briefly, without any success. Not only that, but when they came back to those stairs, they were also gone, leaving them trapped in that big, square room.

“Is this a joke?” screamed Ryuji, pounding his fists against the wall where the stairs had been. “What the fuck is going on here?”

Akira felt his breathing become more difficult. He approached Ryuji, who looked at him with some concern.

“Hey, babe… Are you okay?” he asked.

Akira nodded.

“I just… don’t do well with the idea of being trapped.”

Ryuji cursed under his breath, placing an arm around Akira’s shoulders, bringing him close.

“It’s okay,” he said in a low, reassuring voice. “We’ll find a way out. This place is always shiftin’ and shit, so… I’m sure an exit will appear.”

Akira nodded.

“Let’s wait for a while,” said Ryuji.

They sat on the floor, backs leaning against the wall, Ryuji’s hand on the back of Akira’s neck, both in silence. A long time passed like that — if minutes or hours, neither would be able to tell — before Akira caught something moving through the corner of his eyes. He jumped, staring at that direction with widened eyes.

“What’s wrong?” asked Ryuji, readying his weapon.

“I don’t know… I think I saw something moving.”

Ryuji looked around, furrowing his brow.

“Are you sure?” he asked.

“No,” answered Akira, closing his eyes. “Maybe it’s just in my head… This place is making me nervous.”

“I know,” said Ryuji, giving him a brief kiss on the cheek. “It’ll be over soon, just hang in there.”

As soon as Akira nodded, another shadow moved in the darkness. This time, however, Ryuji saw it too.

“Fuck!” he screamed, jumping on his feet. “There’s something here!”

Akira stood up as well, holding his dagger. They turned their backs to each other, slowly searching the room for whatever that thing was. Every time one of them saw it, was only for a brief second, as if they could only witness the moment it jumped from one shadow to the other. Akira felt his heart pounding against his chest. He was ready, expecting that shadow to jump at them any second.

And still, when it did, they weren’t prepared.

It wasn’t a single shadow, but countless ones, all seeming, at the same time, individuals and connected to each other. They raised from the floor like limbless humanoid figures, staring at them with their heads without faces. They surrounded them, making Akira and Ryuji move to the center of that room.

“What the hell are these things?” asked Ryuji. “Where did they come from?”

“Be ready to fight!” answered Akira.

But they didn’t have the time even to try and defend themselves, for, in the next moment, the shadows attacked, jumping at them. Akira remembered reaching for Ryuji before darkness engulfed both of them, draining their senses away.

* * *

When Ryuji came back to his senses, he was at his house’s kitchen.

No, he was still in the dark room…

It was a strange feeling, as if he was in a pool, with the water reaching the height of his eyes. When he looked over the surface, he was lying on the dark room’s floor, and when he submerged, the scenery changed to his house. He had no control over it, it just kept changing over and over, as if he was actually in both places at the same time. He closed his eyes shut, in a hopeless attempt to make that stop, and, for a moment, it worked, and he was able to see the dark room by itself.

“Akira!”

The name left his lips as soon as he saw his boyfriend lying a few feet away from him. He tried to approach him, but before he could, the image of the kitchen took his mind. He wasn’t alone there, though… He could see two familiar people across the room, arguing. His heart almost stopped: it was his father, clearly drunk as usual, screaming at his mother, who wouldn’t stop crying, cowering in fear. He ran to them, grabbing his father’s shirt with hands too small for a seventeen-year-old. His father turned to face him, a stormy rage in his dark eyes, and something inside of Ryuji warned him to run, to get away from that man as fast as he could, because, deep inside, he knew how that would end.

But he didn’t. He couldn’t leave his mother alone with that man, so the man punched him out of his way, making him fall on the floor. His sight darkened, and he could hear his mother’s scream, followed by the sound of something shattering. His eyes regained focus, enough for him to see his mother on the floor, blood leaving the side of her temple, shattered glass from a beer bottle close to her body. He tried to call her, but before he could, he felt a kick against his stomach.

“Why are you always getting in the way?” the man’s voice sounded raspy and inhumane. “Won’t you ever learn, you fucking brat?”

Another kick, Ryuji vomited on the floor, tears running through his face. Another kick, followed by another. His father grabbed him by the t-shirt, making him stand up, just to shove him against the cabinet.

“My life would be so much better without you two!” the man screamed. “You ruined it! You fucking ruined it!”

Ryuji could barely feel the pain anymore. His eyes were still on his mother, fallen limply on the floor. He didn’t know if she was fine… She wasn’t moving, and he feared she wouldn’t anymore. He felt so scared, he wanted to call someone for help, but he knew no one would come.

That man would kill both of them, and no one would even know.

* * *

Akira opened his eyes, and the room before him seemed to flicker between two different, but, at the same time, similar scenarios: an interrogation room and the dark room where he had been attacked by shadows.

“Akira!”

Ryuji’s voice made him turn in his direction, looking for his boyfriend. But, before he could see him, the interrogation room became solid around him. He tried to move, only to realize his hands were cuffed behind his back. A person stood before him, against the bright light, and seeing the face of his interrogator made his blood run cold.

“How long do you plan to keep playing this game?” he asked in a distorted voice.

Before Akira could answer, the man kicked his chair, making him fall on his side, together with it. He grabbed Akira by the hair, making him look at his face.

“You know, I hate punks like you…” he said in a low, threatening voice. “You think you can do anything you want, without any consequence, but you’re wrong… Oh, so wrong.”

The man slammed his head against the floor, holding him there, with his face against the dirty surface. The man leaned in his direction, his mouth close to his ear.

“And I’d be lying if I said I don’t love putting trash like you back in their place.”

That tone sent a shiver down his spine, and, at that very moment, Akira knew that man wouldn’t be satisfied with just getting a confession out of him.

“You know, punk…” proceeded the man in a casual tone. “I can do anything I want in this room, without any consequence. The cameras are little more than decoration, and no one would try to stop me.”

He made a pause, and Akira’s stomach turned when he felt the man’s wet tongue on his ear.

“You’re rotten, but you sure have a pretty face,” the man muttered to him, clearly having fun with the situation. “Let’s see if I can teach you a lesson about behaving.”

The man grabbed him by the arms, turning his body until he had his back up, raising his hips. At that point, Akira knew exactly what the man planned to do to him, and a suffocating despair started to grow inside him.

“Stop…” he asked, his voice sounding weak and scared. “Please, don’t—”

“Shut up!” The man gave his thigh a strong slap. “If I could, I’d kill you myself… But I can’t, so I’ll just make sure you won’t forget your stay.”

The man reached for the trim of his pants, and Akira started to hope he would just kill him instead.

* * *

Ryuji felt like his consciousness was about to slip away from the pain, when he heard that distant, low voice.

“Stop… Please, don’t—”

Suddenly, his mind was shifting between the kitchen and the dark room again. He could see his father, and he could see a large shadow leaning in his direction. He could see his mother on the floor, and he could see Akira, struggling to free himself from the grasp of another of those creatures.

“Akira!” he called, but then the shadow forced him back into that nightmare. His father was over him, a distorted smile on his face.

“I should just kill you…” he said.

Ryuji glared at that thing: that’s right… It wasn’t his father. It was one of those fucking monsters, playing with his mind. Anger burned within himself: he wouldn’t let that thing do as it pleased for any longer.

“Get away from me!” he screamed at the man in front of him. “I’m tired of this shit already!”

The man simply stared at him, as if surprised by his defiance.

“You never left me alone, even after you went away…” he proceeded. “I’m always having nightmares, and fearing that I’ll become a piece of trash like you… But I’m fucking tired of it!”

He reached for the man’s collar, and his hands weren’t the ones of a kid anymore.

“Get outta my mind!” he screamed, staring into that creature’s eyes. “Get out!”

The kitchen flickered, until it disappeared, giving place to the dark room. Instead of his father, Ryuji was suddenly looking at one of those faceless shadows, which trembled and disappeared. He barely had the time to feel relieved, for soon his attention was taken by an anguished scream. He turned to Akira, and the scene before him seemed to make his heart stop. His body was bent forward, part of the shadow holding his waist to keep his hips up, other holding both of his hands against his back, and other pressing his head against the floor. Akira was crying, trying to get away from that thing, in vain. It was clear what he was seeing in that nightmare, and the thought left Ryuji unable to react for a moment: what he had seen in that nightmare had been a distorted version of reality, but still based on something that happened. That meant… Whatever Akira was seeing there, had at least some basis on reality, right…?

“Shit…” he gritted his teeth. “Akira… Akira, can you hear me?”

He didn’t respond. Ryuji reached for his weapon, trying to hit those shadows, but it was useless… It was like hitting something made of steel, it didn’t even make them move.

“Leave him alone!” he screamed. “Akira!”

He tried to reach his boyfriend, but a shadow creature stood in his way, stopping him.

“Akira, come back!” he called. “It’s not real… Wake up!”

* * *

It felt worse than anything he had been through in his life. Painful, disgusting, humiliating… The more he tried to run away from it, the more the grip around his waist tightened, and, if he started to struggle too much, that man would start pounding harder inside of him, until he was screaming, and gave up on resisting.

“Are you scared, brat?” asked the man in a mocking tone. “Are you in pain? I guess you’re starting to regret all of that shit you did, aren’t you?”

“I didn’t—”

The man buried himself inside him, making a loud scream leave his throat.

“You dirty piece of shit…” he said. “You deserve worse than this… I’ll make sure you’ll remember me every fucking time you even think about stepping out of the line.”

He didn’t answer, knowing it was useless.

“ _Akira… Akira, can you hear me?”_

That distant, familiar voice, made everything around him flicker for a moment, and the memories from that dark room came back to him: the Reaper, the strange shadows… Ryuji there with him.

“ _Akira! Akira, come back!”_ proceeded Ryuji’s voice. _“It’s not real… Wake up!”_

Part of him was still in that interrogation room, and the other was in the dark room, with Ryuji. He tried to keep his mind in the reality, but every time he tried, it seemed like that nightmare pulled him down again, making him relive those horrible memories.

“ _Akira, stay with me!”_

“I can’t…” he answered. “I…”

He felt the interrogator’s fingers burying in the flesh of his hips, and it was too real… There was no way it wasn’t real. He was there, going through the worst moment of his life again, and he just couldn’t run from it. He would never escape from it, no matter how much he tried.

Ryuji’s voice became more distant, as he sank deeper into that nightmare.

* * *

As much as Ryuji tried calling for him, it wasn’t working. He tried to keep fighting those shadows, but already knew it was useless. He had to find a way to reach Akira, but the shadow’s grasp on his mind was too tight… What could he even do?

Akira’s low sobs reached his ears, and Ryuji just couldn’t stand it anymore.

“Please, let him go…” he asked.

The shadows didn’t move. Ryuji gritted his teeth, forcing his way past them without using his weapon, just trying to reach Akira. The shadows didn’t stop him, and soon he was beside his boyfriend. Carefully, Ryuji reached for him, trying to free him from that creature. Akira whimpered, cowering in fear, and Ryuji tried to calm him down with his voice.

“It’s just me,” he said. “I’ll get you outta there, don’t worry.”

He sounded way calmer than he actually felt. In truth, he had no idea what to do anymore: no matter how much he tried, the shadows wouldn’t let go of Akira, and his voice didn’t seem to be enough to reach him. He felt a sharp pain on his chest, and tears threatened to leave his eyes.

“Aki…” he called. “I know you can hear me… Please, listen.”

* * *

At that point, all Akira wanted was for his mind to shut down, so he wouldn’t need to think, or feel anything else. Everything inside him seemed cold and distant, and part of him just didn’t want to _care_ anymore. What difference would it even make? It’d just make things more painful for him.

“ _Aki…”_

That low, familiar voice kept him grounded, and part of him just wished it would disappear as well.

“ _I know you can hear me…”_ it proceeded. _“Please, listen.”_

He felt a light, gentle touch on his face, so different from everything else he was feeling.

“Ryuji…?” called Akira.

“Who the fuck are you talking to, brat?” he heard that man’s distorted voice. “Pay attention to me, and nothing else!”

The grip in his hair tightened, pressing his face against the floor.

“If you try to run, I’ll just make it worse for you, you hear?”

Again, he felt Ryuji’s touch and voice start to fade, but what remained of it still fought for his attention, as if unwilling to let him go.

“ _I know what you’re going through is terrible, but… It’s over already. This is just a dream. You have to come back from it.”_

Hearing those words hurt, and a small sob left his lips when he answered.

“I can’t…”

“ _You can,”_ insisted Ryuji’s voice. _“I’m here for you, okay?”_

He could feel Ryuji’s light caress on his cheek again.

“ _We’ll go through this together,”_ his boyfriend proceeded. _“You know you can trust me, right?”_

“I…”

“ _I know how real it seems, and how much it hurts, but… You can’t let it control you. You have to be stronger than it.”_

“But I can’t…”

“ _You can do it, Aki… You’re not alone, okay?”_ Ryuji’s voice broke for a moment. _“So stop keeping all this inside yourself. I wanna help you, so, please… Just let me.”_

“I—”

Akira was interrupted by the man behind him, painfully burying his fingernails on his thigh.

“What did I just tell you, you fucking—”

He could still feel that man’s grasp as if it was real, but his consciousness was now divided between that nightmare and Ryuji’s soft touch and voice. The nightmare did its best to drag him under again, but he held onto Ryuji as much as he could. He opened his mouth, and the effort to talk almost seemed too much.

“I was… so scared…”

For a moment, the man’s grasp seemed a little weaker. He took a deep breath, and let the words leave his mouth as they came to his mind, without worrying if they made sense or not.

“He kept asking me many things, and when I stayed quiet, he’d hit me. I… I couldn’t even remember why I was there… I tried to tell him I didn’t know what was happening, but… It just made everything worse… He kept touching and hurting me, and… I just wanted it to be over… But he wouldn’t stop… I was so fucking scared…”

A loud sob left his throat.

“Even now, it just won’t stop…” he closed his eyes shut, feeling tears running through his cheek. “I can’t get rid of it… I tried not to think about it, but… It always comes back…”

The feeling of the cuffs restraining his wrists disappeared, and he reached for that hand that caressed his face, grabbing it with all his strength.

“Help me…” he asked. “Please, help me…”

What was left of that disgusting, painful grasp disappeared, giving place to a careful embrace. Akira opened his eyes again, and Ryuji was holding him against his chest, gently caressing his hair with one hand, in a comforting gesture.

“It’s okay, Aki…” Ryuji said in a low voice. “Things will get better now.”

“But I can’t forget it…”

“I know… But we’ll go through this together.”

Akira stayed silent for a long while.

“I didn’t want anyone to know…” he admitted in a low voice. “Especially you. I didn’t want you to think I’m… disgusting…”

“Aki, I’d never think somethin’ like that,” said Ryuji. “You’re the most important thing in my life, and I just wanna help you go through all this.”

Ryuji tightened his embrace, kissing Akira’s head.

“I got you, okay?” he said.

Akira nodded, hugging Ryuji, burying his face on his chest as he allowed himself to cry and be comforted, and feel that suffocating weight in his chest lighten up a little.

* * *

They spent a long time like that, until Akira finally started to calm down. Ryuji knew that wouldn’t end there, though: if he wasn’t careful, Akira could end up just burying all of his pain again and try to run from it. And, not only Akira… He knew he had his own bad feelings to sort out, and it would be wrong to expect Akira to open up to him when he didn’t do the same. Both of them still had a long way to go, and it certainly wouldn’t be easy.

But they had each other, and that certainty was a comforting one.

It took them a while to notice a new set of stair had appeared in that room, leading to a new, unknown place. Without much choice, they followed it, hoping what awaited for them on the other side wasn’t as terrible as what they had just been through.

But, what they found there was a safe room, where their companions were waiting. Haru was the first to notice them, waving while calling the others’ attention. Ryuji and Akira answered to the gesture.

“Ryuji…” muttered Akira to him. “Could we keep what happened there between us?”

“If you promise me you won’t keep the bad things to yourself, anymore.”

“I won’t,” he said, then, after hesitating for a moment, added: “But only if you do the same.”

Ryuji nodded, placing an arm around Akira’s waist, gently caressing the side of his body.

“Alright.”

Akira smiled lightly, also embracing Ryuji’s waist as they walked to where their friends were waiting.


End file.
